My Beba is 6 months old today :)

Now I just want the time to STOP!!! Even though my whole pregnancy and the first few months after I had Preston feel all like a blur now, in a way I’m glad it went by fast. After Preston was 3-4 months old, I keep wishing more each day for the time to go by VERY VERY slow, because each day he is getting more and more fun. I've been the biggest slacker when it comes to blogging, after I had Preston. At first it was the craziness of having a newborn and choosing sleep, house work stuff, errands, time for me... etc etc over blogging. Then I wanted to do anything else but blogging or kept pushing it for tomorrow. I’m upset at myself for not blogging on so many cute, fun, new things, and great memories with our cute Preston. Blogging is the closest Journal I have, so I regret for letting it go for so long. It's amazing how much babies change week by week and what a big difference a month can make. We are SO thankful that Preston is growing healthy. His nick name’s from daddy are "chunks" and "little dude" and from mommy is just "beba"
Except in the very beginning when he wasn’t as happy in the evenings, he is a happy little guy and SO much fun. We both can’t get enough of him each day. I LOVE LOVE being a mom and I truly don’t need any other reason to be happy. Preston IS my happiness :)!!! He is the guy who has captured my whole heart :) Before I didn’t really cared or thought about when I would die, but now I pray I would be alive for him. I want to live for him, be there for him and be the best mommy I could possibly be :) I’m VERY grateful every day to be able to stay home with him. I don’t take for granted not even one moment of it and I DONT wish to go back to work AT ALL, not even part time for a change. I LOVE each day I get to spend with Preston and I would not change it for anything. Yes is true... like everyone told me, my life has changed completely and I don’t get to do a lot of things I used to do. Well, I’m glad of this change, because I had no idea on how much I was missing. Even though I want to take my time and enjoy Preston, I look forward on a baby sister or brother for him. I can’t deny the fact of how hard the first few months were though. The only thing I miss dearly about the very beginning is when Preston would sleep on my chest. That to me is the most precious thing ever and I could never get tired of that. I felt so close to him and wanted to hold on to that moment forever. I was happy when Preston started sleeping in his bed, but very sad we didn’t have that special time together anymore. Just the other day, I took him from his bed while he was sleeping and sat on the rocking chair. I tried to have him sleep on my chest so I could have that feeling again, but there was no way. He is just way too big for it now. In the beginning as babies keep their legs curled so cute :) his feet would be around my belly button area and now they reach by my mid thigh. I almost cried looking at how much he has grown, so fast.

Jesse took this pic. of us around midnight. Preston and I were totally out. (not the best pic. of me, but i love looking at it and remembering the sweet moments i had w/Preston)

I wish SO bad i could have him sleep like this w/me for one more night. I miss it a LOT :(
I breastfeed Preston for about 3-4 months and after that I’ve been pumping and bottle feeding him :) It's working out just fine and I’m SO thankful for pumps. Thumbs up to whoever came up with such a great idea. To be honest I didn’t think breastfeeding was as hard. I’m not saying it's easy, but not near as hard as I heard or thought it would be. It just takes dedication and commitment :) I think breastfeeding ROCKS though. I would definitely do it w/each of my kids for at least one year. 1. Yeah, for sure there is nothing better to feed to your child. 2. IT’S FREE!!! 3. I don’t think I was going to lose all the baby weight as fast, if it wasn’t for it (45lb and some). I truly give all the credit to breastfeeding. Well... carrying chubby Preston around too :) And the beauty of it is that I get to enjoy things I wouldn’t normally eat and still lose the weight. I’m so taking advantage of it, because the moment I stop breastfeeding there is no way I can keep eating like this.
Well, for the past 6 months a lot has happened and a few things are still the same. I don’t remember details of the first 3 months as I must say they were the hardest. Like every mother, I just remember changing endless diapers, endless feedings, not much sleep, being afraid of evenings when Preston would begin fussing and feeling guilty about it, thinking I wasn't doing a good enough job as a mom :( I guess, being a new mom that was “good practice” and lessons learned :) I kind of feel like I will know what to expect and do with our next kid :)

As far as daddy Jesse, Preston adores him. His face lights up and he has a huge smile when daddy comes home. A lot of people kept telling me during my pregnancy that I would be surprised at how things would change when it comes to his child. Jesse doesn’t show much emotions or affections, so to be honest I didn’t think he would be as attached to Preston until Preston got a bit older. Yeah I always knew he would be a good dad and I knew he would love Preston, but I didn’t think he would be much involved with him till Preston got a few months older. I feel so bad and guilty for having thoughts like that. I was surprised and so happy to see Jesse hold Preston so many times in the hospital. He would just take him from my hands and rock him, or just chill in bed with him. He never wanted to hold any newborns, so I guess things Do change when it comes to your own child :) BUT I must say, even though Jesse doesn’t show much emotions/affections, he always does a LOT of sweet/thoughtful things for us, which make me go: "Awwww so sweet". He has a very caring personality and its funny because I feel like he mothers me sometimes..." now zhema be careful with this... don’t do that because of this... so what did I tell you on what to be careful? ... Please put your seat belt on, please drive careful... etc " So, like the old saying: "Actions speak louder than words :)"
When we came home from the hospital, Jesse was acting like a "second mom" to Preston. He wanted me to pump so he could bottle feed Preston, he wanted to be the one to train him to sleep in his bed, he would get excited to put him to sleep and YES he did change diapers, messy poppy ones too. Ha ha ha... he swore that would be my thing to do, he would never touch such thing.
I don’t know if this happens to every wife, but I kind of felt in love even more with Jesse when I saw him what a cute dad he was. It's funny to me when we would race each other running upstairs to get Preston when he would wake up from a nap. We love it and it makes us laugh when we see him get SO excited, happy and moves his arms like he wants to fly, when we go to get him from his bed.
I never thought Jesse would do a lot of things he did and still does. (YES I do feel bad for pre judging him.)
I’m not trying to make everything so perfect. Yes there have been stressful times and is hard having a newborn, but it sure does make it easier when both parents are involved. I remember when Jesse would try to convince me to start having a baby and I would keep telling him over and over that I’m not ready yet, I’m scared, it would be too much hard work blah blah blah... and after a bunch of times, frustrated he told me: "Gosh Elona i would help you!!!" Awwww… Yes, zhema ime does help and I’m very thankful for him. I’m thankful for each morning he lets me sleep as he wakes up to take Preston out of bed, changes his diaper, plays w/him a bit or plays his show for him. It is nice to get that 30 min or 1 extra hr. of sleep. Of course there are disagreements too. Like the usual one when Jesse wants to feed Preston all the candy and sugar possible, while in the other hand I’m working on introducing him to vegetables. Yeah, good luck to me about succeeding on that. I’m afraid he will become “sugarhoolic” now. No wonder he refuses Veggies. "Bring on the popsicle mom, daddy gives it to me, what is this yucky green thing you try to feed me???" Jesse is still crazy about buying clothes for Preston and loves dressing him up. It’s cute when he takes off to the store after work and comes home with a bag full of clothes for Preston. He has better taste than me, so I’m glad he is in charge of that. Preston was 2 weeks old when Jesse whent on this shopping trip for him and got all of these outfits for him.I think he just got carried away for the moment and went a bit overboard, especially getting the same outfit for 3-6 months and 6-9 months. We had to make another trip to the store the next day and return some of the stuff :)

I love the fact that he works so close to home and he makes sure to come home almost every day for lunch, so he could come spend time with us and play with Preston. Preston's favorite "game" is when daddy throws him up in the air. Especially now that he is doing 180's and 360's in the air, he laughs and loves the spin. My favorite part is when he tells me: "It's Ok zhema, I’ll do it. Let me do it" - rocking Preston to sleep, or try to calm him down when he is crying. I think that's adorable. He has the cutest happy/proud face as he comes down the stairs after he has "succeeded" putting Preston to sleep. It's funny to me that most times we "fight" over who is going to push the stroller, feed him, change him, hold him, play with him, try new things with him etc. I don’t know...Maybe we are too excited, it's the beginning and he is our first kid :) We are having a lot of fun w/Preston, that's for sure. Hopefully our second kid will get as much attention too :)

We are especially great full for daddy’s hard work to provide for his family. We appreciate everything he does and the long hours he spends at work. We wish he could be home with us longer, but I guess being able for me to stay home with Preston it doesn’t come as easy. Hopefully latter on daddy will work less hours :)

I love the new feeling that is in our home. It’s weird to say, but I kind of can’t remember how it used to be without Preston at home. I love it how much love a cute little bundle of joy can bring in the family :)
And of course poor Phoenix. He used to be the kid in the family for 5 long years. He used to get all the love, attention and affection from (especially) daddy and mommy. Mommy has been very mean to him since Preston came home. He still loves mommy though and wonders why mommy changed with him. I don’t even know why I changed towards Phoenix when I had Preston. I didn’t want Phoenix to be near Preston and I didn’t even want him to be around me. I don’t know if it was b/c I wanted to make sure he was going to be good with Preston or what... I have NOOOO right to complain not even one bit about the way he has been with Preston. I knew he would be great with him, he is a very good dog, but I’m impressed at how good he has been. I thought for sure he would take all of Preston’s toys and play with them since for the last 5 years everything that was in the ground was his toy. I’m surprised and wonder how he can tell the difference between his toys and Preston’s. (since we give Phoenix plush animals to play with too) He has never grabbed one of Preston’s toys and started playing with it. The only thing that he can’t help himself, is every once in a while he gives Preston kisses in the face. Even though he knows that's a No No and mommy gets mad, he does it any chance he gets :) Now that Preston is older, he grabs, crawls all over him, pinches Phoenix and Phoenix just sits there letting him do whatever. To be honest I’m a bit jealous of Phoenix. Preston LOVES, LOVES, LOVES Phoenix. When Phoenix is around, mommy and daddy do not exist anymore. He gets so excited, smiles/laughs/talks to him and is the best/funniest toy he has. I’m thankful for the good boy Phoenix is and even though we do have him b/c of Jesse, I can’t help but love him.


Anyways... trying to squeeze 6 months in one blog posting, for sure it will be a long one. I’m sure I’ve forgotten things here and there, but the most important thing is that we LOVE being parents. Growing up we all dream about our own family one day and now that I do have mine, I sit back and wonder sometimes, if all of this is true. I look at Preston and can’t believe he is mine. I was the "child" in the family before and now I have my own. It’s amazing how life works. I have mixed feelings about it all. In a way I’m glad we waited as long as we did, but still wished we had Preston earlier. Babies truly are angels that bring a piece of heaven in a family. Because of my Beautiful family I love my life more than ever now and I feel so complete and full of love.
We are more than great full for everything we have been blessed with. We for sure don’t take for granted the opportunity to be parents and most of all that Preston is a healthy boy :)
(did i say enough the word "LOVE" in this post??? :)
P.S. Ha ha ha... I thought of sharing this funny thing Jesse tells me over and over. He keeps taking all the credit when it comes to Preston. He says that he is the one who "created" him. He had the "special ingredient" to make him and i was just the oven to bake him :) He keeps comparing it with the brownie mix. "Would you be able to make brownies without the brownie mix?" - he asks me. "I had the "brownie mix" and you had the oven to bake it" - he tells me. Or... "I was the chicken sitting on top of the egg". He kisses me and tells me: "Thanks for taking such good care of my egg zhema :) "
Of course he is joking, but for some reason I feel like women have most of the credit for making the babies. Everything gets created inside them from beginning to end for heaven’s sakes. All guys do is have fun for 1 night, how do they get half of the credit for it???? Not fair...

The Bachelor!

I was looking forward on posting about this, but the way it ended i didn't even feel like it at all. Me and some of my girlfriends from my ward had been planing on watching the final episode of the show 'The Bachelor" together at my house and we were so excited about it and could not wait to see all the "Deanna drama". Little did we know, Deanna was nothing compare to the real drama. I was planing on taking some pictures after the show when we were all happy with the ending and enjoying some chocolate fondue, but that's not what happened. We were all pissed at the end and i didn't even think of taking pictures. The only picture i got was this silly picture of the stuff i prepared, before the girls came over.

If a bunch of girls get together, it better be some chocolate around :)

We all went from liking Jason, to hating Jason. Melissa and him were SO cute together. OK, it didn't work out, BUT what he did to her SO publicly was horrible!!! Here he was complaining to Deanna for letting him get on one knee and almost proposing to her... when he goes and does something 100 times worse to Melissa. Poor girl. She kept saying during the show how she has been "the dumpy" on all her relationships and trusting Jason (thinking he is the nice guy we all saw on TV) thinking he will never do that to her.

Anyways...I'm sure whoever saw the show knows what I'm talking about. I TOTALLY felt like most of whatever happened was scripted. Especially the Deanna part and the "Molly didn't know anything about Jason wanting her back" part. OMG nice try on trying to fool people. I've watched all "The Bachelor" and "The Bachelorette" shows, except when Charley was the Bachelor. I don't know if i can watch Jillian being the bachelorette though. Not a big fan of hers. I have NO idea how she was in the final 3 after her stupid hod dog theory and now she gets to be the bachelorette!!!

I know this is such a dumb post and the show is kinda stupid...i think I'm done watching it. Jesse will be one happy man. He cant stand the show!!! He used to watch it with me because i would give him back scratch, but after a while no way he would watch it even if i gave him 10 hrs of back scratch. He kept saying how he will gladly watch it, if one of those stupid girls would say : "NO i don't want the rose!!!" After the show, he would ask me if anyone said NO to the rose :) Jesse especially hates the show, because after each episode i would tell him how i wish he was a little more romantic. Ha ha ha... maybe that's why ONLY 1 couple has lasted, because reality is not like that.

Even though it was such a bad ending, it was still fun hanging out with the girls and watching it with them. Thank you girls for coming over. I wish it was a better ending. We need to find a better show now to watch together :)

Being bigger is so much more fun :)

Our cute little Preston is almost 6 months now and he is having so much fun with all the new things he is able to do now. Here are some random pictures and a video:

Has been more then a month that i sit all by my self and i LOVE it :)
In the last 3 weeks I've notice that we have something SO Cool in the house. His name is Phoenix. When i see him, i don't care about anyone or anything. I just want to play, touch and stare at Phoenix. How did i miss him all this time, he is the best toy and entertainment i have :) Now i get to play with bigger and better toys. I especially want to put ALL of them in my mouth. Everything that's in front of me :) I don't know why i look so surprised in this photos?!

Now that I've got the sitting by my self down, daddy is trying really hard to train me to crawl. Gosh that is SO hard and i think is a bit early for me, BUT daddy spends so much time trying to teach me, so i try really hard. When i try for a while to crawl and i cant, i just pretend like I'm flying. It's a lot easier :) Gosh, trying to crawl is a real work out. I just get exhausted.

Here is a video of my favorite thing of ALL. If ti wasn't for daddy getting tired, i could do this all day long. One other thing that i LOVE, is jumping. I think i lost 1-2 pounds by doing it SO much :) So hopefully next time i go to the doctors i will be on the 98% tile, not in the 100% :)

(Sorry im so lound in the video. Next time i better whisper, being so close to the video camera :)

Confession...

My dearest blog!

I just have to be honest and tell you that... I've been cheating!!! There is this other network called Face Book and I just "hang out" with it one time and I could not stop seeing it. I was having so much fun with it and enjoying it SO much, that I totally forgot about you for a long time. I'm truly sorry :( !!! The whole time I was feeling guilty for cheating on you and not being faithful to you, but I just could not resist FB. FB it's SO much fun and "knows" the same friends as I do, so is a blast hanging out with it. I’m sorry to tell you that I was having a lot more fun with FB than with you. BUT... I’ve decided to come back and try to be faithful to you once again. I will try to hang out with you more often :) I just CANT stop seeing FB though. I have to see you guys both at the same time. Sorry if that bothers you. I know you were "my first love" but FB has won my heart lately and I only had time for it. Please don’t be jealous of FB. FB is really nice and not jealous of you :)
Anyways... I want to make thing better now and try to see you more often. Hope we can get back together like before and "hang out" as much as we can. I’m looking forward on having a blast with you too.

Truly yours,
E-lo :)

Valentines Day!!!

Even though both Jesse and i feel like "Valentines Day" it is just a comercial day for bussines to make money, we still try to do something little for eachother. We just feel like anyone can celebrate V-Day any day of the year, any time.
Anyways...it was a very nice, fun and simple V-Day. Eventhough i made Jesse a yummy breakfast with all my love (like i always do:), it wasnt as special as what Jesse did for me.
Jesse wanted french toast for breakfast, so i did all of them in heart shape. With melted chocolate i wrote around the plate "Happy V-Day, I Love U" and tryed to decorate it nice. I'm upset i didnt take a picture of it. I was trying to finishit up before Jesse came in from shoveling the snow outside and i barely finished before he walked in the door. I gave it to him and we started chatting, so i forgot all about the picture. I love making french toast w/a little vanilla. It makes the house smell so yumm :)
After bereakfast i had to run to the store and buy a few things. When i came back, i found a red envelope on top of the counter, written on it "ZHEMA IME". I opened up and LOVED the card i saw.

Jesse wrote on the card:

"This is one reason why i Love Zhema. But why else do i love zhema?"

It is true though. Jesse and i are different in a lot of things, but i could not see my self being married and loving anyone else but him. He tryly is the LOVE of my life.
So i thought he wanted me to start guessing and telling him: why else??? After a few guesses he told me that i will find out through out the day. Hmmmm... ok :) I walked in our bedroom to go and take a shower and there i see a rose inside "The Book of Mormon" on my night stand dror. I go to take it and i see a sticky note on it saying: "Because she wants to spend FOREVER with me!" Ohhhhhh... sweet. I go and kiss him and say thank you and as i walk to the shower i see another one by my side of the sink in our bathroom. It sayed:"Because she is too Bukur!" ("Bukur" means "Beautiful" in Albanian) So i go and kiss him again and he tells me that i need to keep looking for 3 more. I forgot all about the shower and started looking around the house. I go upstairs and see another rose inside Preston's crib saying: "Because she is the best mom!". I found another one in our bedroom inside our bed saying: "Because she gives me the good back scratch!" The long thing in the picture is what i use to scratch his back sometimes when we read or chill in bed before we go to sleep. He fricken LOVES back scratch. I think he likes it more than... you know... because when i first saw the rose on top of our bed i though he would say: Because i give him the good Lovin!" LOL, sorry... too many details :)
The last one was hard to find. I did guess it, but i could not find the rose. He put it inside our oven, saying: "Because she cooks me!" I Know that sounds weird, but he is saying it in a funny way. Has been like this from the beginning when we got married. If i translate word by word from Albanian to English i would say it like that. In English it sounds like i will cook Jesse... lol...but in Albanian it makes perfect sense. We know it means to cook something FOR you. So since when we were first married i was asking him: "Do you want me to cook you" and he never corrected me for the longest time but kept laughing about it and saying: Yes, cook me please ;). Until after a while he told me why it was funny to him.
I was like a happy little kid in Christmas time, running around the house trying to find the roses. It really touched me and i was SO impressed by my sweet, thoughtful Jesse. He has done something similar like this a few years ago, where he wrote on a card top 10 reasons why he loves me. So this times he had to write 5 different reasons. He repeated the " Beautiful" reason though and I'm OK with that :) He is a very private person when it comes to showing affection in public. He wants to leave thing like that for at home only. He truly is a very caring, loving, kind and thoughtful husband. I mostly love him because he has a very sweet and forgiving heart. He is SO patient with me and I'm very thankful for it. I LOVE you Zhema ime :)
We had plans to go to SLC for dinner, but since it was snowing non stop we decided to stay in Orem instead. Of course as we went out the weather got clear skye and sunshine, but oh well we still stayed in Orem. The shortest wait was at Iggys restaurant, so that's where we went. We love Iggys, so that was great.

We had stake conference this weekend so we had to go after dinner and attend that till 8:30 and after we went with our neighbors to "Red Mango" for a yummy frozen yogurt treat. We chatted by the fireplace for about an hour and half or so and had a fun time there. We love our neighbors, they are so fun :) Thank you SO much mom and dad for babysitting Preston the whole time we were out.

HaPpY NeW yEaR eVeRyOnE!!!

HaPpY b-DaY Zhema Ime :)

My BiG BeBe turned 28 today and once again cached up with me. We have 5 months difference in age and back home that's a NO NO. Bad girls do that. Good thing we didn't meet back home and we live here now :)
All he wanted to do for his b-day was to get together w/friends and watch the UFC fight again, for the second time in a row on his b-day. He LOVES UFC. He is pretty low maintenence. When i asked him what kind of cake he would like, he said Cupcakes. Huh?? Really? He loves ice cream cakes from Dairy Queen or Cold Stone and that's the answer i was expecting. "Nop, i want cupcakes"- he said. Great...cupcakes it is!!! (easier for me :)
Every time we've gotten together with friends at our house to watch UFC fights, the kitchen is the girls area where we chat-eat,chat-eat and chat-eat some more and all the guys chill and watch the game in the living room. The hot topic for the past few times has been a lot of baby talk, since has been a pregnant women in there each time.
It was a fun night and it was nice to start doing the same stuff we used to do before we had Preston. My SUPER sweet mom offered to babysit Preston for the night. It was the first night i actually slept in my bed since when he was born and slept the whole night. Thank you mommy. You are the best mom ever and i love you VERY MUCH :) As nice as it was though, gosh i missed that little stinker tremendously. I slept all night trying to picture his cute little face in my head. It is crazy how attached you can get to your child. I don't enjoy anything without him anymore :)
I didn't take much pictures though, as we were just chatting the whole time. Jess helped me take some pictures. Thanks Jess :)

HaPpY bIrThDaY zHeMa ImE!!! i LoVe YoU :)

Our "BIG BOY" :)

I've heard it from almost every mother saying "I can’t believe how fast my baby is growing"... I have mixed emotions about it. Someday I do want these first 6 months to go by fast so we can do more things with Preston and some times I want to stop the time so I can hold, kiss and hug Preston for as long as I want. The more he will grow, the less he will want to just stay in my arms and cuddle for a long time like we do now. I don’t want him to grow too fast and time will come when he will be like: "is not cool for mom to kiss me" or "mom don’t kiss me in front of my friends, that embarrassing" Anyways... I know I have a long ways to go till then, but I just don’t understand where the time goes. Especially the past 6 weeks, have gone by like days.
Yesterday I took Preston for his 2 month doctor appointment. We took him for his first doc. appointment when he was 2 weeks old and we could not wait for his second one to see his growth rate. He has been growing a lot and does not look like a 2 month old baby. Most people think he is 4 months old. I love it how they have the Growth Chart at the doctors office. Jesse and I were expecting some big percentages at this doctor visit :).
The first thing the nurse said was: "Wow he is a big boy; he does not look like 2 months old". Yup...we've heard that before.
She did the height and head measurements and I was shocked to see Preston weigh 15.10 lb OMG!!!

Our cute "Chunly monkey", outgrew the scale

He moves SOOOO much constantly

At his first doc. visit (2 wk's old) he was: 8.82 lb That is 1 lb more than expected and made him at 51%. 20.75 inches tall, he grew 1.25 inches in 2 wk's. His head was 14.76 cm.
This last visit he was: 15.10 lb and that make him at 98% HOLLYYYYY!!!! 24 inches tall, makes him at 80% And his head was 16.14 cm that makes him at 69%. So everything was above average.
We all have noticed how much and how fast he is growing. He is turning in to this "chunky monkey" like daddy calls him. Sometimes we wonder if we should stop feeding him :) He sure loves food and it does show. I feel like the whole neighborhood knows when he "screams at me" because he is hungry. I don’t dare to let him without food, he acts like I haven’t been feeding him for days. My dad is funny about it, he says: "Well, I don’t blame the little guy. That milk is his bread, meal, fruit, dessert, drink, water... Everything. Of course he will love it and can’t wait to have it".
The doctor said that I have good milk and it’s very high in a calorie, that’s why Preston is gaining so much. He also said that he much rather have a healthy chubby kid, than an underweight one. He is growing just fine and is healthy, so there is nothing to worry about. Definitely don’t stop feeding him, he said :) He will get older and loose the extra weight.
Well... I better get some good arm muscles to carry him around I guess. Good thing he is a baby. You can SO get away with those chubby rolls in your legs, beer belly and double chin when you are a baby. That's the only time ppl think that's cute :) Awww… I just can’t get enough kissing and grabbing them :)
Preston got his first shots too and it was so heart breaking to watch. Gosh they do too many at the same time. He got 1 oral first, witch he loved and 4 shots in his legs.

Enjoying his first vacine :)

Right as the nurse did his first shot. The look in his eyes was like: What the heck just happened??

Ohhhhh so sad to see him cry so much and cry with tears. I cried after him ;( Im glad my sister told meto give him Tylenol before going to the doctor’s office, because he fell asleep after for a long time.

I went to my moms house after, so I could be with her if Preston was in too much discomfort. Poor guy he woke up after a few hours screaming from pain. He would move his legs and scream and cry. It was so sad that I couldn’t really tell him not to move his legs. I’m so thankful for moms and their old fashioned ways of taking care of pain. She applied some whatever method her grandma taught her and it eased the pain, he didn’t get any burses or hard part where he got the shots either. Nothing, like the nurse told me. Thank you mom for always helping me w/Preston and taking such excellent care of him. We love you :) I was so happy the night was nothing like I expected. Thankfully he slept just fine :)

Nursery

Some of you have asked me to post pictures or a video of Preston's room. Sorry it took me so long, i finally did it :)
I'm still not done with it though (i know what am i waiting for, huh...) I need to add some more decor on the walls and put some pictures up. Both, Jesse and i didn't want to do a theme on his room. Whenever Preston is old enough to understand, he can pick his own. Basketball, spiderman... etc whatever he likes.
Jesse came up with the colors and the painting idea. Everything else we picked together. The only thing he would not let me do was drapes. If we have a girl next, i get to put some drapes too :) So i made him choose between drapes and the rug. I'm glad he picked the rug, because I LOOOOVE the rug :)
Anyways... here it is. Sorry the quality of the video is not that great.

Preston 16 days old...

Smile

My little baby is smiling already. During the weekend I noticed Preston’s first smile :) It was the cutes thing ever and I wanted him to do it over and over again. It made my whole day and I would picture that cute smile in my head all weekend long. I wanted Jesse to see him smile too, so bad. Today when he came home for lunch, Preston was in his swing and as Jesse was talking to him he smiled again. "Zhemaaaa he just smiled at me" - Jesse said. Preston smiled again and again, as we were both talking to him and he was cooing too. Ohhhh that was the most precious parenting moment for the both of us. He always smiles while he is sleeping and I adore that, but he smiling at us, is just priceless. There is just nothing more adorable than your baby smiling at you :) It makes every thing so worth it. I just LOVE it :)

YES YES YES!!!!!!!!!!

Last night was the first night Preston slept in his own crib for the WHOLE night :) You have no idea how happy mommy is and Preston is a happy baby too :)
The bassinette thing worked for the first little while, until he started to wake up the moment we would lay him there. On top of that, during the night i was changing his diaper a lot of times worrying about diaper rush, but all i was doing is waking him up a lot. One night i even changed him 5 times, because i thought he would sleep better with a clean diaper. I guess i was tottally wrong. Im thankfull my mom told me not to change his diaper during the night, especially not to whipe his little bum bum with cold wipes :) So since he was fussing in his bussinetter, i just gave up and let him sleep on my chest for like 5 nights straight. I know, i know that is bad, BUT is mostly my fault. From the time i was pregnant i was looking forward to hold him and cuddle with him as much as i could. That is my favorite thing to do. I just cant help it, when they croll like a ball and they are so little, cute and cudely. I loved every min. of those nights that we slept together so close. I could not get enough of it. Plus he and i were sleeping so well and Preston was not fusing :)

After worrying that he might get too used to it, Sunday night Jesse and i decided to give his crib a try. When we went to his 2 week doc. app. the doc. said we can put him to sleep in his crib now. Well, the first try didnt go too well. He felt asleep 3 times while i was breastfeeding him and after i would put him in his crib, he would wake up after max 20 min. Jesse tried too. He put Preston to sleep 2 times, soothing him in his arms and the same thing would happen. I was so tired and exousted that i could not do it anymore. Jesse took care of Preston for 2 hours while i kinda took a nap. After that i just gave up and just let him sleep on my chest again. He slept for 4 and a half hours, got up to eat and slept some more. The little stinker can sleep just fine when he is cuddeling.
Anyways Tuesday night we thought of giving the crib another try and im so glad we did. I gave him a bath, fed him, changed his diaper and while he was still drowsy i layed him in the crib. I keept reading in different books to put babies in their crib while they are still drowsy and let them fall asleep on their own, but i didnt really think that was possible since I was having a hard time making him to sleep in his crib after he was fully asleep. I gave it a try and it worked though :) He was looking around for a while with his eyes half open and finally went to sleep. Yipeeee. I think a bath before bed time helps too. Plus he loves the sound his little "Speel Sheep" makes.
When morning came i could not belive it he slept in his crib the whole night :) I was shouting to Jesse: He did it!!! He did it!!! He did it!!!
Im planing on doing the same routine every night around 9PM, until hopefully he will get fully used to that schedule. Wish me luck :) Plus the crib looks so much better with him inside :)



P.S. I alredy miss having him sleep on my chest though :( Is just too cute...

PRESTON MERO WHITE

Preston was born on September 4 at 6:12PM, at the American Fork Hospital. He weighed 7 lb and 11 oz, 19 inches long and was 8 days overdue :)
After all, we had to wait for the day I got scheduled to be induced. The hospital called around 2:30 PM on Wednesday to let me know that we needed to be at the hospital the next day @ 7AM. That’s when the anxiety, excitement, being nervous and scared it all started. I hardly slept that night. I got up at 4AM and started to get ready. After last Saturday experience at the Provo Hospital, I was even wondering if the inducing thing would work. That's all I could think that morning. It felt like I was never going to give birth.
It felt weird when we got to the hospital and they accepted us in and started to get things ready. We had to wait for a half an hour or so for the nice nurse to come. She was way sweet. When she was doing the paperwork and heard me talking to my mom in Albanian she asked where I was from. Surprisingly enough she had been in Albania in 1991 for a while, so we had a lot to talk about it. Also, it was funny when she showed us what the hospital wrote down in the paperwork like I was Hispanic. I guess they just assume things :)
From the moment I got to the hospital I was feeling really warm. I kept asking Jesse and the nurse to turn the AC on. Even though it was as cool as it could go, I could not feel anything. My poor mom had to get a warm blanket from the nurse and Jesse had to put his hoody on,cuz it was freezing. I guess weird things like this comes with pregnancy ;)
The nurse started putting the IV in me around 8AM and shortly after that the Doctor came to break my water. I totally felt the "pop" sound. I was still dilated to a 3 and 90% effaced. No water came out right then, so we thought it will take a little while. The nurse thought that Preston's head was blocking the water from coming down. Anyways... the nurse started putting the potassium and was explaining to me that after my contractions start being 3 min. apart I will dilate 1 cm per hour.
The whole time I was hoping that the anesthesiologist will come at the same time they start to induce me, so I would feel no contractions. He was busy with another patient who was having a C-Section that morning, but the nurse told him to come right after. I was SO happy to see him shortly after the nurse induced me. While he was working on the epidural I kind of felt a few contractions, but I bet they were so mild compare to the real ones. It was cool the way they do the epidural. I had the impression that my legs would be totally numb from it, but it wasn’t like that at all. I could move and feel my legs just fine. They felt like I slept on them a little bit. It was great. I never had to push the button for more epidural.
I stated having contractions regularly right after the epidural. The monitor started beeping and we noticed that Preston's heart beat went way low. From around 140 beats per min. to around 40. That was scary!!! The nurses gave me the oxygen mask and started to move me around and checking things out, until Preston's heart beat went back to normal. We had no idea why that was happening. The nurses told me to lay on my left side and keep the oxygen mask on the whole time. After a little while it happened again. We were wondering what in the heck is going on, but the nurses took care of it once again. When it happened for the third time, 3 nurses came in the room and I could tell they were worried. They removed the heart beat monitor from my belly and put another monitor inside me touching Preston's head, so they could monitor him better. On top of that I had no fluids come out at all after the doctor broke my water. That was kinda strange and it made me worry. How did Preston stay inside me without any fluids? The doctor said that I did have fluids when they did the ultrasound, so she was sure the baby was ok and had no idea where it all went. They decided to put some fluids in me, to protect the baby, so I had a huge bag of fluids, IV and another thing not sure what, all going inside me. Holly crap, my feet and hands and face got all swollen. I kept telling Jesse and my mom that I feel like I have "Shrek" feet and hands. Anyways... we were worried about Preston's heart beat more than anything. I could not lay on my right side, because that made his heart rate go even lower. So for the 10 hours of my labor I was laying on my left side the whole time. My leg was COMPLETELY numb. On the other hand my blood pressure was getting really low and I was shaking. They had to put a medicine in my IV twice during labor to make my blood pressure go to normal. I was feeling so weak and out of this world b/c of my blood pressure being so low. I was wondering how in the world I would have any energy to push. Thank goodness by adding more drugs in my IV they got my blood pressure under control. I was a drug addicts that day.
Preston's heart beat got low again and they figured out that every time I was having strong contractions his heart rate will go down. So they had to shut down the potassium and give me a shot to make my body stop having ANY contractions,that was being way hard on Preston. In the mean time the doctor was there and was thinking of C-Section. They even brought out stuff for Jesse to wear in the surgery room. The doctor told us that if Preston's HB doesn’t go normal in the next 2 min. I will have a C-Section. Thank goodness that didn’t happen.
I was dilated fully after 6 hours, but they didn’t want me to start pushing until they figured out the whole situation with Preston's HB. Plus he wasn’t as low as he should have been, so they were hoping the fluids that they put inside me would help him drop some more. So for the other 4 hrs of labor we had to wait for Preston to come down a little bit more and for his HB to be stabilized.
For the second time the doc. was really close to decide on doing a C-Section, because everything what was going on was too hard on Preston and he was getting overtired. Again, thank goodness she decided not to. She went to deliver another baby in the mean time and said that after it, it will be my turn to start pushing and get this baby out of me :)
We took our laptop with us and thanks to SKYPE we called my sister in Toronto, CA so she could feel like she was there too :) Every time I thought about having a baby, I pictured my mom and sister there, so I was so glad she was a part of it too (through the camera) She was able to see the whole delivery and after Preston was born. That was way cool, thanks to the great technology we have now days :)
After waiting and waiting, around 5;30PM the nurses started getting things ready for me to push. They kept saying how this baby has had enough and he is tired now, he needs to come out. My poor little Preston :( :( Doctor Smith was explaining to me how she will use the "4 sep" method to deliver Preston, because it will be dangerous for me to push Preston all the way out on my own, since he has been having this many HB problems so far. I pushed for about 25 min. The nurses were super nice and helpful through the whole delivery process. I really liked all of them. Jesse didn’t really want to see anything, so he just stayed by my head rubbing my hear and holding my hand. It was funny cuz he was giving me the looks like: Ohhhh poor you zhema. Once Preston's head was a little out, Doctor Smith told me to stop pushing and started using the 4 sep method. Shortly after that my babylicious Preston was out and of course my mom and I started balling. They did put him on my stomach for a min. and we could so tell he had a hard time during labor. Poor guy was like purplish-blue. They had to take him from me to rub him and make him cry more, cuz he wasn’t really crying much. While the doctor was stitching me up, they did the normal routine with Preston and after that my VERY favorite moment came. I could not wait to do the skin to skin with Preston. I was amazed at how nature works and how God created things. He had his mouth open and wanted some boob right away. How do they know?? How do they know how to suck right away too?? I was SO HAPPY that he latched on just fine and I was able to breast feed him for a bit. I loved every min. of it. The nurses had to take him down to the nursery to give him a bath and do whatever they do in there. Jesse went with him and recorded the whole thing, so I could see his first bath and other stuff they did there, too. When i saw the video, I heard the nurses say "He looks like he was overdue,looking at his skin" When i didnt go in labor on my own i wondered if they got my due date wrong, but i guess not. He really was overdue.
I was waiting for my epidural to wear off, before going to our hospital room. Well, after 2 hours I was still as numb as in the beginning. I wanted to just go and see Preston again, so bad. By now all the nurses that helped me before were gone and there were some new ones. Finally after I asked the new nurse 10 times "Can I go to my room now...?", she realized that the other nurses left my epidural still running, that’s why I was still numb. Ohhhh great...She just had to let me go with my IV still in me and they had to give me a ride while I was still lying on the bed, to the other floor.
By then it was around 9PM and both of our families where all there to see little Preston.
The night was a little rough and just because I was so excited I could not sleep. I just kept staring at Preston all night long. On top of that my stupid blood pressure was still low and I wasn’t feeling my self at all. The nurse had to keep the IV on me a lot longer. By midnight I was so glad they forgot to turn off my epidural, cuz once it run off OMG I could fricken feel all the stitches and that wasn’t fun at all. I was so thankful for the sweet nurse on call that night. Bless their hearts what for what they do. She basically was my mom for that night. As embarrassing as it was I had to go to the bathroom with her so she could see how things were and after that they could remove the IV from me. I was so glad she did come with me at the end, because I totally passed out in the bathroom. I hated that night. I could not wait to feel my self again. After they drugged me up some more towards the morning I was fine. I didn’t send Preston to nursery at all, except when they had to take him for check ups etc. Jesse spend the night with us sleeping on the "not so comfortable" bed beside me.

Daddy and Preston chillin in bed the morning of the second day in the hospital :)

The next day went by really fast. Family, friends and coworkers came to visit and that was fun. The pediatrician stopped by too and we were glad to hear that Preston is a healthy little boy :) He suggested doing the circumcision while Preston is still in the hospital, instead of waiting 1 week. Ohhhhhh poor little thing, how sad :( Neither Jesse nor I wanted to go and watch it. I was dying inside from feeling so bad. I waited a little bit and walked to nursery to see what was going on. The doctor was done and he said that Preston cried for a little bit in the beginning and he felt asleep half the way through. When I went to see him the nurses were doing his hearing test. I was glad to see him sleeping instead of crying hysterically. Honesty, circumcising is " Crime against little baby boys" How sad they had to go though such painful thing on their first day of life :( "Welcome to the world little boy. Let me take a good chunk out of the most sensitive part of your body. That will be lots of fun" It was so painful to see it when I changed his diaper. OMG that looked awful. I had decided not to give him a binky, but I gave up then, seeing him in so much pain and discomfort. Plus from the moment he came out, he was sucking his fingers a LOT. He loves his binky, there is no way I could keep it way from him.
Breastfeeding was going fine still; I just wasn’t as relaxed and felt very stiff. I guess I was nervous too. I loved holding Preston though. I swear they are little angels sent from heaven. He would smile in his sleep and I could not get enough of it. I thought that was the most precious thing ever. When he was awake he kept looking around like he was following smth, so I bet they do see angels around them. Looking at his precious face all night was so much better than sleep :)

The next day we wanted to leave the hospital as soon as we could. So after the nurse did the final paperwork, we were out of there at about noon. I have to say, I was very pleased with all the nurses there. I have such better appreciation for them and for what they do, now.
Seeing Preston in his car seat made us laugh. This tinny little thing chilling in this big car seat, being all serious.
We came home and introduced Preston to his new home, his bedroom and to Phoenix. Jesse had brought a dirty diaper form the hospital for Phoenix to smell, the day before. I read that somewhere in a magazine and though it was a great idea to kind of prepare Phoenix with the new arrival. Phoenix did great :)
So at the end of all this we were VERY thankful to Heavenly Father for watching over Preston and blessing all of us. No matter how much people want smth and pray for it, he knows best. That’s for sure!!! The nurses and the doc. were saying "how lucky I was to be induced and not go in labor on my own where no one could monitor and do smth about Preston's heart beat". I wasn't going to have any clue about his low heart rate while having contractions at home. So looking back now we know why nothing that we tried worked. The doctor said it right: "Is like playing with fire..." We are VERY thankful to Heavenly Father for answering prayers in the best way for us. For blessing us with a perfectly healthy little boy. Most of all we are SO thankful for being blessed with a little angel at home and having the opportunity to become parents :)